ii

Buffy Sainte-Marie - You´re Gonna Need Somebody On Your Bond

karen dalton

if you've got money - bridget st john

oh arturr i do hope you are happy i do hope i do hope i do hope i do hope you found a warm place to sleep tucked inside a haybail cozied contentment & ihopes you miss me too

for louee

night cloud amber glow
down upon city street
sog shoes step first snow
all light last stand leaves

elevator to hainon

up fifty floors burning torch in hand a fleeing frenzy from/with mother candy packets red n glossy filled with lucy twelve hours each time never too intense a city in distress another appearance by miss margaret sophie many cigarettes first time outta country yknow ! in cahoots with myself - hovering episode mother sleepn open breezy windows air damp n warm it confuses makes her angry

kittenbirth

a state similar but filled with loved ones past most prominent miss margaret sophie n darlene but still alive ? grandpa faith larry sissy john jack wish to remember words but s'ok great to see her in state so confoosed need explanation beg mark awakuni-swetland for knowledge only words he spits, "just wait." left confused perhaps new space? old structure rotting wood small square space painted green just for me against brown not my own. birth to human? kitten? of mine, but named by another: "amelia yellow rose" then lost! need to name, but must first find! search searching wake UP sunful room, kitties kneading back

Chelsea

what you think? http://www.vhemt.org/
9:16pmSam

hold on a sec
9:18pmSam

totally irresponsible

it's like a rapist commiting suicide because he/she is remoursfull enough to want to die but not responsible enough to right the wrongs done

what do you think ?
9:20pmChelsea

i think they're on to something

n i think it will piss lots off

but.. i dont think theyre advocating shunning responsibility

they're saying fix shit as much as you can but dont bring anymore in
9:21pmSam

if we were to carry out this "plan" the earth would not survive
9:22pmChelsea

what makes you think that?
9:24pmChelsea

(i will be back real soon)
9:24pmSam

we have, cultivated the environment for the last 100 years, and built infrustructure that requires maintainance to insure that is doesn't harm the environment even more than it lready does
9:25pmChelsea

nuclear plants n such?
9:25pmSam

like nuclear power plants. there is no science that solves the problem of turning of a nuclear power plant. if humans aren't around to operate there techology it becomes even more destructive

yeah they talk about that

but the don't have a scientificly backed operation for solving that poblem

not to mention agriculture
9:26pmChelsea

so you think its better to just keep doing what we're doing?
9:26pmSam

if we stop growing in the feild that we have plowed and firtalized for so long nothing except weeds(if that ) can live there

no it's gonna fall apart no matter what soon

but you have to repair these things befor the human race could ever give the earth back to itself
9:30pmSam

i dunno, i just think that humans have a tendancie to demonize themselves when they feel like they have exasperated all other options
9:32pmSam

what have you been up to ?
9:46pmChelsea

meg is here. was downstairs talkn to her
9:46pmSam

sweeeet!!!
9:47pmChelsea

ever heard of the world without us? it predicts nature bein pret-ty good at overcoming what was here

made by us of course
9:48pmSam

never, sounds cool though. i guesse our tendencies to demonize and our tendencies to pretentiously claim our necesity are just tendencies

?

or something
9:49pmChelsea

some sorta scewing

or not
9:50pmSam

what do you mean ?
9:50pmChelsea

it's all real i supppose sometime i never decide to side anywhere xcept sometimes its everywhere

skewing probably
9:50pmSam

yeah

you should watch that movie collapse
9:51pmChelsea

n its all just a real as the next
9:51pmSam

or beter yet
9:51pmChelsea

i'm reading the book right now
9:51pmSam

read a michael rupert book

this is true

isn't it great!!1

witch one are you reading ?
9:52pmChelsea

jared diamond yeah?

collapse: how civilizations choose to fail or succeed
9:52pmSam

no i'm talking about michael rupert he wrote many books and a movie just came out called collapse and it's just an interview of him

that sounds sweet though
9:53pmChelsea

hmm havent heard

collapse is a buzzword these days
9:53pmSam

yeah, this is alot about peek oil and things of that nature
9:54pmChelsea

so you think it is better to have a child than not?

what if...
9:54pmSam

i think it's better to be truely happy and on a dying planet than to be truy miserable on a living one
9:54pmChelsea

industrialized societies gradually choose to not bear children
9:55pmSam

but i think you can be truely happy in any situation environmentaly

partialy due to there inability to provide for said child
9:56pmChelsea

right

mostly
9:56pmSam

as population microscopes the "better than i had it" mentality that parents hold is lost because the society is unable to keep a standard of living growing
9:56pmChelsea

ok and then "developing" countries that are reproducing the fastest end up being the ones to move in and decide what to do next?

what if yr happiness in said environment is dependent upon the unhappiness (i.e. death) of other species?
10:00pmSam

i don' beleive that rue happines could ever be found in that situation by annyone ever

but that cant be eplained in numbers or facts i guesse
10:00pmChelsea

so do you think anyhuman is truly happy right now?
10:00pmSam

yes

many
10:00pmChelsea

can it be explained with experience and "gut feelings"?
10:01pmSam

i am every once in a while and i think you are too

i can explain it to myself verry easily but i couldn't ever dream of explaining it to anyone els
10:01pmChelsea

i have always been spiritually distressed i think

no need to explain. i surely feel happiness
10:02pmSam

i think being the change you want to see is much more profound and humanity-changing than anything els
10:02pmChelsea

i've always been so sensitive that it seems impossible to be happy knowing how so many feel

i agree
10:03pmSam

initiatives, laws, cultural pressures don't realy impact people to move and change onl to fear

me too
10:03pmChelsea

but it shouldnt disgregard the change that has taken place in the past
10:03pmSam

but that sensitivity in my case is insecurity and guilt

no it shouldn't
10:04pmChelsea

its mine too but some of it feels pitiful

insecurity, guilt, shame, pity, all such ugly words

excpet pity is so close to pretty. which may also be an ugly word
10:05pmSam

yeah
10:05pmChelsea

i want to feel right now instead of worrying about tomorrow. is that too much ?
10:05pmSam

thery are prety words if they are in the context of the past and totaly iradicated from the present
10:05pmChelsea

conquered concepts
10:05pmSam

i try that every day and when it works it feels great
10:06pmChelsea

yes but still the reality for so many breaks into my consciousness n it hurts.

guess it has a lot to do with what i study

depressing points of view i hear

but mostly from the mouths of those who feel it. quite convincing
10:07pmSam

if you think about how others feel their pain, your feeling more than they are in many cases, how does that help them ?
10:07pmChelsea

never said it did

i think its pitiful. the very definition of the word
10:07pmSam

i know but how i that logical?
10:07pmChelsea

but it does motivate me to make change. to be change
10:08pmSam

then its not pitifull, just maybe making it harder for yourself
10:08pmChelsea

or to throw flag up n try jump ship ;))

ive always been this way
10:09pmSam

i wanna be on a ship

or in the ocean
10:09pmChelsea

yr brother is on one
10:09pmSam

hows my bro doin ? did you see him ?
10:09pmChelsea

i just went to visit!
10:09pmSam

i thought he go t off
10:09pmChelsea

yes hes good we went to ocean and forest

hes back at sea for long time
10:10pmSam

sweeet

is he happy ?

how long ?

it;s his birfday
10:10pmChelsea

just wait to see pictures
10:10pmSam

i'm so sad i can't see my brother right now, i just got supper sad in my stomach and eyes
10:11pmChelsea

s'ok

be sad.
10:11pmSam

i no i no
10:11pmChelsea

he seemed swell.
10:12pmSam

good

and how are you ?
10:12pmChelsea

i don't know if i believe that anyone is truly happy, but i don't even know if that actually exists

happiness truthfully
10:13pmSam

it's never sustained
10:13pmChelsea

i don't think i am. i feel spurts
10:13pmSam

but it's there
10:13pmChelsea

right exactly
10:13pmSam

i'm sure you've seen it

i feel so happy i cant even sit still some times
10:13pmChelsea

what if it could be better? what if this is just a shade of what it could be?

me too but so spurtful

like you said, not sustained
10:14pmSam

it can be better

first step towards it is letting go of control

which will probly take me my hole life
10:15pmChelsea

when i think about the largest possible context the lbiggest picture i feel totally happy

in knowing this never ends

but can improve
10:15pmSam

totaly
10:15pmChelsea

letting go of control? i say realizing yr own control as human as one of all

instead of just one

that didnt come out right
10:16pmSam

but you don't control anything but yourself is what i mean
10:16pmChelsea

realizing the power of all of us together sorta business

i think differently
10:16pmSam

yeah totaly
10:17pmChelsea

influencing goes a long way. i suppose not exact control but .. yeah

sorta control

or laws

attempted control
10:17pmSam

yeah there is power it's just not verry much
10:17pmChelsea

or religious following

power i one or a group?

in
10:18pmSam

anywhere

we are free, imagine if you where unable to feel despair how much you would crave it, and maybe not beleive it exists
10:19pmChelsea

we are free

we succumb though
10:19pmSam

yep yep yep

to ourselvs

no one makes us do anything, just trick us

black magic
10:20pmChelsea

n sometimes can't escape the consequences of our neighbor's actions
10:20pmSam

we never could in the first place
10:21pmChelsea

so then agency is somewhat irrelevant?
10:21pmSam

i gotta go to bed, sorry gotta wake up early early and work work for mony money to be happy happy happy

no irrelevent just not important ?

thats a good question
10:22pmChelsea

ok

impact?
10:22pmSam

no dads shop :(:(

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-Q1oDmANIXc&feature=related

chck this out it will only make ya sad though
10:23pmChelsea

will you make me a tshirt with the wonderwoman logo or a picture of her on it?

and a pari of cotton shorts to match?

i will give you money on friday
10:23pmSam

yep

ok ok ok
10:24pmChelsea

i asked harrison but he was bein a punkwad as usual

size medium
10:24pmSam

ok cool
10:25pmChelsea

luv you sam

sleep well
10:25pmSam

have a good night, i wouldn't trade these lite FB convos for the world

love you tooooooooo!!!!!!!!
10:26pmChelsea

fb convos. lets talk for real soon
10:26pmSam

ok ok sounds spectacular
10:26pmChelsea

kbye
10:26pmSam

bye